Tag Archives: sufficiency

this simple meal

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deep within the woods

One day, this day, lies before me. One step, the next step, is to be taken. I have strength for only one. I have manna for one day only. If I try to grasp at more, it rots within my hands. One day, one step, one piece of grace to give me strength to face it.

I kneel at an oaken table, deep within the woods, deep within a clearing where the large stump forms that table and where the brightness of the day is obscured by the heavy canopy of trees. Only one shaft of light finds its way through and hits the surface of the table with a clear, bright beam. In the spotlight of that beam, centered within its ray, is the simple meal of manna, which is spread for me this day. A cake of bread, a glass of wine, a napkin unfolded underneath as a cloth for the meal to rest upon. Nothing beside these simple provisions.

I say my grace before the meal… my grace, my prayer for grace, sets my heart in tune with the meal itself, to receive its nourishment. “Oh, Holy One, open my heart to receive your blessing for this day. Open my eyes to see your will, my hands to carry it out.” I reach and take the bread, break it and hold it for a moment in my hands. “This strength of yours I eat. I ask that you help me to spend it in your service and on your priorities. Help me to know what I must do, and to separate that from what others would like for me to do, from what I sense as urgent, but do not have the wisdom to also sense as hollow – an empty, busy bluster with no lasting value. Feed me on wisdom today, my Holy Friend, and let its essence creep into my soul.”

One step, one beam of light to guide, one hand to hold. For as my meal is ended, you join me here and offer me your hand. I take that hand of love and rise to meet the day. My own shallow wisdom is not enough, but the love and the wisdom that you offer is more than enough.

Isn’t that, after all, the promise of the manna? Enough for one day. Enough.

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[photo by Jaroslav Kuba per cc 2.0]

the choice

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gray choiceMy mind is pretty muddy lately
I wander in circles and find myself nowhere
Where did I put that bit of wisdom that I thought I held?

I need eyes that see – that clear the fog around me and pierce through to hope.
And yet, I have no secret in my heart to take me there.
I am bereft.

Is this where it ends?
Or where it begins?

It seems my impotent soul must make a choice –
The only power left to me –
The power to give up
Or the power to let go.

It seems the same choice, but it is not.
One leads to despair,
The other plants a seed for hope.
One leads only to ashes,
The other looks for a phoenix from the fire.

The idea of giving up
Sits on the edge of my awareness and grins it’s cruel grin,
Telling me that I might as well accept the truth of futility.
Why struggle anymore against the inevitable?
Why sacrifice if it leads to naught?
Better to hunker down and protect, as best I can,
What is still within my grasp.
It is the easy choice – requiring only the merest nod of agreement –
And the abdication of my faith.

But there is a false bluster in that specter’s grin.
It is not so confident as it seems.
It’s eyes are never smiling.
The upturned lips are really a scowl –
A mask it wears to fool the world,
Hoping to convince itself, as well.

If I am to die – and we all do –
Then I would rather die an open soul, held in relationship.
Than one curled tight around fear and despair.

And so, I release my small nothing into your grace.
And decide against despair.
I turn away from the hard, empty scowl of discouragement.
And seek the warm smile of friendship and of hope.
It is the best that I can do, today.

[image cropped from photo by Antoine K per cc 2.0]

Thank you

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morning coffee

Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.

Thank you for the morning quiet.
Thank you for a fuzzy robe, pulled round my frame.
Thank you for a cup of coffee, warm inside me.

Thank you for a long deep breath.
Thank you for the words that rise in my heart when I am quiet.
Thank you for the words of others that stir my thoughts and tilt my soul.

Thank you for plants that grow, for life that sings.
Thank you for beauty, and for beauty’s call to my heart.
Thank you for your abundant grace, for your quiet peace.

Thank you, O Holy One,
For pulling the world into your embrace each morning,
For calling the future to a new awakening in you.

Quicken my soul.
Energize my work.
Let me be a conduit of grace into this day.

Thank you, Holy One.
Thank you.
Thank you.

[photo by Kristina Alexanderson per cc 2.0]

 

my true self

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imprint of a leaf on water

My true self –
The self I long to meet

The one where I fit nicely in my own skin
And equally well in my community,
As if we are suited to one another

The one where goodness is not fake
But a natural expression of a maturing soul,
And where continuing growth is the sure future

The one where I can embrace the flawed reality
That is both where I live and who I am,
And still find peace and beauty … and firm hope

The one where I dare to join the dance
That is the world’s becoming,
The very echo and response to the Holy Three.

This is the self you call me to be.
This is the self I will become.
This is the dance of life.

[photo by Karl-Ludwig Poggemann per cc 2.0]

[thanks to Richard Rohr’s daily meditations]

beauty

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blue heronBeauty is to the spirit what food is to the flesh. – Frederick Buechner

Indeed!
All the beauties of this scene sing to my heart:
The imagined rush of wings,
The crisp, cold kiss of snow,
The delicate colors of feather on feather,
The bright eye, focused on flight.
The wonderful balance of it all.
Hurrah for beauty, as it feeds my soul.

[photo by Mike Bizeau from his wonderful blog, Nature has no Boss, used with permission]

counting on hope

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budding hopeLet me count the hints of hope that ring my days:

a new marriage for my daughter – forged from hard lessons and determined love

a new grandchild, looking in wonder at the world and babbling joyfully

a steady hug from my husband, ever ready to comfort, support and tease

friends – so many kind and committed friends – who grace my days with centered wisdom

and, somewhere in the hidden corners of my heart, the whisper of the Holy One.

 

[photo by Cam Miller per cc 2.0]

A blessing as you wed

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happy coupleMay your days be filled with the fingerprints of love,
The quiet, almost imperceptible affirmations
That keep you steady in the midst of bustle:
The cup of coffee shared on grateful mornings,
The hug when you are weary,
The hand you reach for in the presence of beauty,
A sigh at the end of a long day,
Your heads upon a common pillow.

May these small moments coat your days
With the tangible presence of grace – of lived affection.

May the wonder of this day’s celebration,
Echo far into the future’s future
As you grow in each other’s presence,
And find your true selves, truly held,

Within your heart’s true home.

[Celebrating E&M 11 26 16]

the hole in my soul

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holeThere is a hole in my soul that needs filling.
Stuffing it with newspaper just won’t do.
Neither will ignoring it, or just walking around it.

The hole is a wound,
Not from the slash of a blade,
But from the steady friction of the world.

I need the salve of your hope.
I need the wisdom of the great physician.
I need … you.

Oh, my little one, you have me.
Always and forever.
I am before and beyond.
I am within and throughout.
I breathe inside your breath
And leave the dusting of my presence
Wherever you are.

The trick (though it is no trick)
Is to be there. Fully there.
Fully embodied; fully infused.

This reality is already yours.
Now, before you retire.
Now, before you even start your day.

I am yours and you are mine.
That is true regardless.
But when you open to that truth
That is the magical moment (though it is not magic);
That is when your heart quickens with the breath of hope.
That is when wisdom invades your words
And grace flows from your touch
When you become the conduit of my love.

Oh, Holy One,
I long for this to be true.
It seems I always stand on that precipice of longing
But I lack the courage to fall into that reality.
So, year after year, I come to the very edge of promise
And turn to go without fully embracing its truth.
I leave the blessing for the busyness of my days.
I postpone your call, to answer the phone.

Pick up the phone.
That’s me on the other end.
You can answer my call in that conversation.
Trust – it comes with action.
Doubt is just the mud on your shoes.
Keep walking – it will be worn away.

[photo by Daniel Meyer per cc 2.0]

 

Do you not know?

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patterns of light
Do you not know
Oh little one
That worship shapes your soul?
That words continue to call worlds into being?
That coming is joy, not duty?
And that, oh, I do love you.

Do you not know
Oh little one
That I love you into being even now?

Come. 
Listen to your heart and come.
Let go to the joy
Let go in sweet abandon
Let go into my arms
I will catch you
And embrace you
Come.

Would that I could dance with you.
That I could slip into the melody
Lose myself in the embrace
And stop concentrating on the next step
Or trying to do it right.

Would I could simply receive the embrace
And let go into love and music.
Would that I were not just me.

Ah but my little one
I made that ‘me.’
I love that ‘me.’
And I embrace that ‘me’
Even now.

You can step on my feet as you dance
I do not mind
So long as you dance.

I just wish you could embrace the mistakes as well
It would be more fun 
For us both
If you would let me remove your worries 
And just dance, love, be.

I can handle the rest.
Believe me.
Believe me.

I do love you. 
And all the whole I call you to be.

It is love that calls . . . 

And joy that answers

Ah! Amen.

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[photo by 李小克 Klaire Lee per cc 2.0]

hope for this day

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dance

This day,
This day,

Oh Holy One,

Let me unclench my fists so that I might receive your grace.
Let me stop trying to run ahead, and turn, instead, to dance with you.
Let me give the baton into your hands and just enjoy the music.

Let me give you my fear in exchange for your hope.
Let me open my heart as a conduit of love.
Let my fingers carry your blessing to this moment.

Let me trust that you are, indeed,
Bending the arch of the universe
So that all will joyfully come home to you.

May your dreams come true.
May I dream them with you.
And trust enough to laugh along the way.

Amen.

[photo by Dixie Lawrence per cc 2.0]