I sit beside Cecil on the beach.
We are sad, so we lean into each other
Finding the comfort of presence.
He understands, much better than I,
How to travel these emotional paths;
How to walk them to their destination;
How to feel them through.
I want to avoid them,
Deny their wrenching angst.
I want to ask for the magic wand
Of a fanciful god, to wave them away.
He holds to a deeper, wordless faith,
A steadier faithfulness:
One anchored in an unshakable trust
That the goodness of God remains true.
I look to circumstance for hope.
He looks to relationship.
I want a cure; he seeks healing.
I long for a fix; he knows where his heart is fixed.
It is fixed on love,
Which can cast out the fear.
I lean hard into his bulk
Hoping to absorb his steady faith.
He reaches his arm around me
He pulls me close and kisses the top of my head
Somehow I know that Cecil is channeling a deeper love
And that it will hold me till I heal, till I am changed.
Somehow I know I will be held
Through this storm, and the others that will come,
Until the arch of justice is bent into a circle
And we all are called to dance within it.
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